How My Husband And I Are Working To Understand Each Other Better

This past Friday, my husband and I went on a date to one of our favorite little places in town. It’s cozy and quiet and you can get delicious Greek food in a setting that someone from any of the past fifty decades could recognize. It’s kinda my favorite. Oh, and they put so much cheese on their pizza that it’s physically heavy to lift. Also my favorite.

I ordered a pizza for obvious reasons and he ordered a pita. In between big bites of cheesey carby goodness, we worked through a book my friend, Jana, loaned me: The Enneagram Made EasyProcessed with VSCO with a4 preset

The Enneagram is method for understanding personality types. According to the Enneagram, there are nine types of people. The Enneagram is kind of like any other personality finder/test that you might have experienced in the past, with a few major exceptions.

One, it’s super accessible and easy to understand. It doesn’t take long to figure out your personality type and “wings” (how your personality may be influenced by other types).

Two, the Enneagram doesn’t just tell you your personality type, it tells you how this personality type reveals itself in your career, your free time, your relationships (kids, spouse, and friends), and your emotions.

Three, and this is a big one, the Enneagram doesn’t just tell you your strengths, it also tells you how you will struggle based on your personality type. This was huge for me. I couldn’t believe that so many of the things I was good at or struggled with wasn’t because of who I am as an individual, but because of my personality type which millions of other people share. For some reason, this was oddly reassuring. I’m not just crazy, I’m a FIVE! (More on that later.) Continue reading “How My Husband And I Are Working To Understand Each Other Better”

The Fight

Last week, my husband and I had the worst fight we’ve had in a long, loooong time.

It wasn’t over money. Or inlaws. Or how to raise our kids.

It was over tape.

Like, literally, tape.

Long story short, I can only take so much of the mess my family makes in our home and when they start to get into the things that I strategically put away so that they can’t find it but I can, and then lose or destroy said item, I can really blow a gasket. So while my complaint was valid, my approach was not, and what ensued was an epic battle over yes…tape. Continue reading “The Fight”

Three Keys To A Successful Marriage

It’s not easy maintaining relationships with people. It take a lot of hard work, intention, and a million other things that we human beings are prone to not be very good at. We all have higher expectations for others than we do for ourselves. Even the people who tend to be hard on themselves. Take me, for example. There are plenty of things that other people do that drive me crazy, and yet, I find myself doing those exact same things. Only, it’s not quite as big of a deal when I do it. It’s a double standard, and we all have them. All of us.

I’m going to venture out on a limb, though, and say that one of the hardest relationships to maintain and grow is marriage. The stakes are higher. We are around our spouse more than most other people. And you deal with issues within a marriage that you don’t typically have to deal with in, say, your typical friendship. Money, sex, kids, in-laws, and living habits all play a huge part in making your marital relationship your hardest relationship.

Mike and I will be married 11 years this July. We will have known each other for 12. It’s hard for me to tell you just how I feel about my husband. I’m crazy about him. He makes me a better person. I have no idea why he loves me the way he does, but I’ll be eternally grateful for his love. He is, above all else, my best friend.

He is my person.

To say that our marriage has not been easy is so beside the point. No one has a easy marriage. No one. Marriage, by definition, is not easy. Nothing that requires you to combine your life with the life of another person could be easy. We are all selfish and self serving by nature, so anything that requires us to factor in another person will be a struggle.

And that struggle, is real. For all of us.  Continue reading “Three Keys To A Successful Marriage”

10 Ways I Make My Home Cozy & Calm

One of my greatest desires for my home is that it is a sanctuary for all who enter – friends, family, heck, even the guy who came to replace our water softener. More than my desire for it to be updated or clean, what I want most is for my home to feel cozy and calm. I’ve learned over the years that what meets the needs of my friends and family is not a picture perfect home or a five star meal, but lots of love dished out in a relaxing setting. Here are 10 simple things I do to help create an atmosphere that allows us to all relax and unwind. Continue reading “10 Ways I Make My Home Cozy & Calm”

My Favorite Ways To Celebrate Valentines Day

I have a confession to make. Valentines Day, is my favorite holiday. I love it in all it’s pink and red and hearts and candlelit glory. All. Of. It. Don’t even say it’s a made up holiday because, duh, all holidays were made up at some point. And don’t even try and give me some malarky about how Hallmark has commercialized the day to sell more cards. I love, greeting cards.

When I was a kid, I read this book about a little girl who threw her family a Valentines Day party every year. From that moment on, so did I. I would invite my mom, dad, and brother up to my room where I would have a table decorated with a festive cloth and filled with goodies (that my mom helped me buy, of course). I distinctly remember there being popcorn balls and fortune cookies (popcorn balls were my jam as a kid).  Continue reading “My Favorite Ways To Celebrate Valentines Day”

New Year. New Me.

Happy New Year, readers!

Last night, the Shipper Fab Five spent the evening at home. We dressed up for dinner, had a dance party, played a few games, and watched a pre-recorded countdown at 7:00 PM so the kiddos could be tucked in bed by 8 (God bless you, Netflix).

It was hardly the most glamorous NYE of my life, but we aren’t exactly in a glamorous stage of life. (Bea and I had our first baths today in…well I can’t say. It’s just too embarrassing.) Continue reading “New Year. New Me.”

On Friendship

Anyone who knows me even remotely knows that there is nothing I love more than getting together with my friends.

One thing I love in particular  are my coffee dates. Since becoming a stay at home mom, these coffee dates and truly – these relationships – have been fuel for my tank. I love my kids, but the daily details of motherhood tend to be pretty draining, even on the good days. The women in my life, on the other hand, offer so much refreshment. We laugh, we talk about books, we talk about tough things, we make fun of our kids (hey, you’ve gotta have a sense of humor in motherhood or the children will eat you alive). Continue reading “On Friendship”