An Update On My “15 Minutes A Day” Goal

A few months ago, I shared with you my goal to work out for 15 minutes a day.

Although I would describe myself as a regular exerciser, I have one fatal flaw – I tend to go all or nothing. I either go for a morning walk, do a workout at the kids’ nap time, and then throw in a little yoga to round it all out – or – I do nothing. I don’t like living in extremes, mostly because, well, I tend to gravitate towards them. I wanted to change my approach to be a little more balanced and to keep my workouts more consistent, so I gave myself a challenge: exercise every day for just 15 minutes. I could exercise for more if I had time or the energy/motivation, but the goal was just 15 minutes. It didn’t matter what I did, just that I did something.

(You can read that full post, here.)

Continue reading “An Update On My “15 Minutes A Day” Goal”

We Did This. We Built Busy

I do this thing where I will emphatically, without any doubt in my mind, come to a decision. Done. Decided. Good to go.

But then, as I’m in conversation with others and start to feel a hint of either disapproval or maybe even just differing viewpoint on the subject, I start to doubt. This of course leads me to obsessively attempting to explain myself. I start to feel crazy at the thought that the other person doesn’t agree, because does that mean I’ve made a mistake? I believe what I believe so strongly! What does it say about me if what I believe so strongly isn’t reflected in the beliefs of the people I so admire?

I tailspin from there.

I’m just being honest with you. I don’t know why I feel the need to preface today’s post with this little caveat, I just do. Maybe it’s because I process my thoughts through my writing, and I’m really trying to get to the other side of this annoying little habit of mine. Because really, it’s super annoying.

Lately, I’ve been struggling with defending my beliefs on busyness.

Here’s the thing. The pull of my heart has been away from busyness and towards a life of hard work and meaning. I’m starting to understand that most of us confuse hard work with busyness. We think we are achieving so much by our busyness, yet simultaneously making ourselves and everyone else around us miserable in the pursuit of busyness.

You might say, “But I don’t pursue busyness, it just happens. Life is just busy!”

Bull crap. Cancer happens. Loss of a loved one happens. Fertility struggles happen. Busyness doesn’t just happen, we choose it. We choose it by not choosing the alternative. We choosing it by not asking ourselves if there is an alternative. We choose it by allowing others to dictate to us what is important. We build a cage of our own making, and then flail against it’s bars bemoaning the loss of our freedom and our happiness, never once stopping to notice the tools that built the cage which are still in our very own hands.

We did this. We built busy. Continue reading “We Did This. We Built Busy”

Life Lately

Beatrice will be four months old next week, which quite frankly, is rather astounding. Our life seems to have always included the five of us. Except, in all reality, it hasn’t. What’s even harder to believe is the number five. I’ve only been a mother for five years. What did I do before this??? Who knows. Who cares. Now is now.

One thing I’ve found funny as a mom of three kids four (and a half) and under, is that my sense of capability swings wildly from “Oh yeah, I’ve got this!” to “Oh man, I’m drowwwwwning. Help. Me.” These sentiments also usually happen within minutes (seconds?) of each other. It’s a wild ride, if nothing else. Continue reading “Life Lately”

Your Kids & Your Job Are Not Your Purpose (And Other Life Lessons Learned From Play Dough)

I read a lot. As I read, nothing makes me happier than when I read two separate thoughts from two separate works from two totally different people and something just clicks. It’s that moment when everything comes together and your mind just goes from casually interested to totally blown. I had one of those moments recently when I read the following two quotes:

“Homemaking is not something that stands in the way of our deeper fulfillment; it becomes the ground that feeds it.”
-Shannon Hayes, Radical Homemakers: Reclaiming Domesticity from a Consumer Culture

“Let me make a distinction between career and creativity. Creativity is connected to your passion, that light inside you that drives you. That joy that comes when you do something you love. That small voice that tells you, ‘I like this. Do this again. You are good at it. Keep going.’ That is the juicy stuff that lubricates our lives and helps us feel less alone in the world…Career is different. Career is the stringing together of opportunities and jobs. Mix in public opinion and past regrets. Add a dash of future panic and a whole lot of financial uncertainty. Career is something that fools you into thinking you are in control and then takes pleasure in reminding you that you aren’t. Career is the thing that will not fill you up and never make you truly whole. Depending on your career is like eating cake for breakfast and wondering why you start crying an hour later.
-Amy Poehler, Yes Please

I’ve come to the conclusion that most of us have a seriously dysfunctional view of purpose, careers and motherhood. We view these three very unique things as one. Then, when purpose starts pulling at motherhood and motherhood starts pulling at career and we try to find purpose in our career and try to make a career out of motherhood, wow, do things get messy. And complicated. And confusing. And dissatisfying. And we just end up eating cake for breakfast and crying an hour later.

Or to use a visual analogy, it’s like my son’s recent play dough/leggo man creation. He can say that he mashed some stuff together to make it “one,” but we all know it’s just two totally separate toys that are crammed together, totally incongruous and dysfunctional. Continue reading “Your Kids & Your Job Are Not Your Purpose (And Other Life Lessons Learned From Play Dough)”

Cold Hands, Warm Heart (And the Best Tomato Soup Recipe EVER)

My maternal grandmother always tells me that having cold hands means you have a warm heart. I like that. My hands are always cold. I like the thought that this physical anomaly is proof of such a pleasant quality as a “warm heart.”

As I write this, the sun is out, the snow is slowly falling, my mug is full of fresh coffee, and my heart indeed, feels warm.  Continue reading “Cold Hands, Warm Heart (And the Best Tomato Soup Recipe EVER)”

Taking Stock

Last year for Christmas, my brother and SIL got me this blog. This year, they got me these awesome t-shirts with my very own logo to give away and spread the His-Girl-Friday love around and celebrate my one year of blogging. One year! I can’t believe I’ve been doing this for a year. I can’t believe all the changes that I’ve gone through this past year. Life is certainly not the same, and it’s hard to completely wrap my mind around all the details.  Continue reading “Taking Stock”

What You Really Need to Know About Stay At Home Moms

This year, I made the transition to full time stay at home mom (SAHM), with the exception of the yoga I teach locally two nights a week. Although it has been a long journey to get to this point, I now find myself in a position where I really enjoy what I do. I’m happy where I’m at and doing what I’m doing. Which quite frankly, has come as a bit of a shock.

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Continue reading “What You Really Need to Know About Stay At Home Moms”